The End of The Beginning

What happens when something ends? There is separation, change, the unknown. Im not sure what is going to come.

I am ending with my therapist of three years, I am ending a training course that has been the centre of my life, but hopefully not the friendships and the skills. I am ending the stressful deadlines and the constant requirement to prove myself as good enough to practice. But this is just a transition. The ending of the beginning. I cannot know what is to come, all I can do is ride the uncertainty and remain open to what may happen. There might be surprises around the corner that I would have never predicted.

This is a painting that I am still working on, I have been using this piece of wood to paint on for a year. It started off in my garden and I poured varnish on it and spray painted it. I have sanded it back and stuck things on and taken things off. Now I am adding this figure which is straight from my imagination. This might be the final layer, it might not be. I have thought that it has been finished before and then I carry on.

This painting in some way describes the last year, even though the layers cannot be seen, I know they are there. Some of the previous abstract layers were full of turmoil and confusion, but this is how we learn. If a person always thinks they know what they are doing, they are not learning or growing. So, I guess this is what this image captures for me is growth.